Into the Mind of an ‘APROKO’ – The Silent Investigator5 min read
Adebimpe’s curiosity started about six weeks ago when she walked into the hotel lobby and found some ladies gathered near the elevators; whispering and giggling. On a closer look, she realised she recognised some of the ladies from her training programme. The training programme was barely a week old and at that point, she could not address any of them by their first names because she had not registered most of her classmates’ names.
The training programme was a requirement to fully be employed by the organisation that recently recruited her and many others. It was to run for three months: different trainees from all the states of the country had been accommodated in a nearby hotel and it was its lobby she found these young ladies.
While she was still trying to figure out what must have caused such a scene, she remembered the facilitator had mentioned that there was going to be a test that morning and that was why she was rushing out in the first place. She soon forgot about the group as she became more focused on the test at hand.
Her curiosity was awakened about three days later when it seemed like most ladies in her class knew something she did not know. Every time she tried to listen while they chatted and laughed, the only word that was ever constant was ‘posh babe’. The phrase did not help her much because she had no idea who was so called. Adebimpe waited a few more days to see if anyone would slip and actually call anyone ‘posh babe’ but that did not happen in the few days she expected. If the group of ladies had stopped the whispering and giggling, she would have forgotten about it and classified it as ‘none of her business’ but it became ‘her business’ to find out who this ‘posh babe’ was when she realised that even some guys in her programme knew who was so called.
Her next phase of action was to make more friends within her programme especially with the particular guys that seemed to know. Since it was the age of BB pins for BBM and phone numbers for WhatsApp, she decided she was going to get both, even if she had to ‘suck up’ to different people. She even went as far as suggesting that the class have a BBM group and WhatsApp group so that no one would miss out any vital information that needed to be passed across. She knew where she was headed with that suggestion; it was a way to get other classmates’ pins for those she could not walk up to directly and also to see if any of them had the Display Name, DN ‘posh babe’.
With the BBM and WhatsApp channel well on the way, she decided to launch her private investigation to find out if she could search for her female classmates on Facebook and Twitter. She retrieved their actual names from a list she had in her possession: fortunately, one of the facilitators had asked her to take the attendance for a class that none of her classmates had missed and the list also had them indicate their gender. Every night since that day, she dedicated at least an hour to search no matter how tired she was. Fortunately for her, the lady that shared her room was never curious about what she did on her computer. She probably assumed she was busy with the programme’s assignments and catching up with old friends.
It has been six weeks and she still had no idea who was called ‘posh babe’ until about ten minutes ago when a guy walked up to her, stretching out the item he was carrying while saying he had been asked to give a parcel to ‘posh babe’. Adebimpe was really puzzled.
‘I do not know who is so called’, she said but the guy repeated again ‘I was asked to give this parcel to ‘posh babe”. Adebimpe told him politely to go meet the person that had sent him so he could ask the sender to describe the lady he was referring to. While she was telling him that, she was also trying to remember if he was one of the guys she had observed mentioning the phrase in the last weeks but he was not! ‘Meaning someone must have told him my name for him to head directly to me’, she thought as she was seated where there were several other ladies. One of the ladies closest to her urged her to take the parcel and open it. Adebimpe went ahead to do as urged: the first thing she saw as she opened the parcel was a letter addressed to her, Adebimpe. It read, ‘to our lady of ‘class’, the one we call “posh babe”. Thanks for always putting us in check’ and underneath was a beautiful brown leather wallet wrapped up in scented tissue. She was more than curious to know who sent the parcel.
Apparently, it was sent by Folarin, a guy she hardly spoke to except from the general ‘hellos’. He had seen her on the first day of the training programme and was taken by her charisma; it was from that moment he had nicknamed her ‘posh babe’ and had asked everyone to keep it a secret till he told her himself. The reason she kept seeing them whisper and giggle was because he kept trying to find the perfect gift for her and always came up with suggestions that resulted in laughter. Adebimpe was so embarrassed: all this while she had been trying to find out who it was, only to discover the person she was silently investigating was herself.
Folarin made a show of going down one knee and publicly apologising for putting her in so much suspense. He also asked if they could friends: the whole class was chanting ‘yes’ before Adebimpe could respond.
Food for thought:
You never know when the tables might turn around. Be careful with the ‘aproko’ business, you might be investigating yourself…winks!
BB: BlackBerry BBM: BlackBerry Messenger DN: Display Name